An open letter....

An open letter to Francine Rivers,

Oh Francine, how I have loved you from the moment my heart read and bawled reading "Redeeming Love." It was like you looked in my life and saw the battle that I have fought. The Love that I have fought against. The Love that pursued me.

I read your 'Mark of the Lion' series, and gloried in the Love that pursued Hadassah

And I began your latest book :'A Bridge to Haven' reading how a sweet pastor found a little girl, seemingly thrown away, and took her in as his own.

And I knew what was coming.

A girl. Running away from God's love. Seeking her own pleasure.

Thinking she was not worth the Love of her Father.

And I seethed.

I have heard it all before.

Girl runs. A man loves her. And she feels God's love.

It has been so long since I've felt HIS love. Or a man's love for that matter.

I was somewhat bitter through out the reading of your book. All the while glorying in the love that your book was displaying.

I was reminded YET AGAIN of what I feel I have missed out on.

But then you had to go and post your "Note from the Author" and explain that the inspiration for your book came from Ezekiel 16.

And I wept.

And read..

Realizing that I have experienced that kind of love. All along.

And I NEEDED to be reminded. In anyway. Always.

Thank you for reminding me.

Yet again.

Sincerely,

A reader for life,

Kathy

"This is what the Sovereign Lord says: I will deal with you as you deserve, because you have despised my oath by breaking the covenant. Yet I will remember the covenant I made with you in the days of your youth, and I will establish an everlasting covenant with you. Then you will remember your ways and be ashamed when you receive your sisters, both those who are older than you and those who are younger. I will give them to you as daughters, but not on the basis of my covenant with you. So I will establish my covenant with you, and you will know that I am the Lord. Then, when I make atonement for you for all you have done, you will remember and be ashamed and never again open your mouth because of your humiliation, declares the Sovereign Lord." Ezekiel 16 

"Letting go isn't giving up."

"Letting go isn't giving up. It's trusting God to do whatever He has to do. Remember what you know to be true…Sometimes God has to destroy in order to save. He has to wound in order to heal."
{Bridge to Haven, page 123}

This was such a fun read for me. I got lost in the story and love being able to "escape" in a good book. The quote I posted above was a favorite of mine. It was the lesson I felt God weaving in my heart throughout the week I was reading this. It brought me to tears many times as I thought about my own children growing up…making choices…running away…dating wrong people…

In theory I can say that I trust God…that I trust Him with the lives and future of my children…but would I still pray so fervently for them if they had run that far…done that much…made that many bad choices? Or would I just say, "I give up."

I pray that I will always be a faithful prayer warrior to my children, no matter what journey the Lord chooses to take them on in order to save their eternal souls.

Looking forward to the August book!

Jess

Bridge Haven and August book

I got so pulled into the book I read it in a very short amount of time and stayed up late two different nights.
I cried for my daughter as I read it and it was helpful to me as I continue to walk her through her pain of abandonment that effects us every day.  This kind of heart wound is so so deep and so painful and so tiring.
It was a beautiful story of redemption and I cried several times.  What a great reminder that God can and will redeem us.  His love can reach us no matter how far we are.  His kindness will lead us to repentance.  

Our book for August is chosen by Kathy Jacobitz.  This book is coming out as blockbuster movie this fall so it will be great to have read the book first.
Unbroken

July Book

So I loved our book for June and I love reading about true historical people of the faith.  I am inspired and challenged and so thankful.  I knew of a lot of these people but really enjoyed reading more and learning a little more.  I cried through some of them.  I also want to quote them but I can't find my book.  When I find it I may come back to write them.  Hudson Taylor!!!  and Amy my girl. Oh their love for Jesus and the word and the gospel excite me so much.

I have a fear of wasting my life and being deceived by this world and living for the things in it.  I remember before Christ in my life living for this world and how empty it is and at times in my life now I find myself off course living for the wrong thing.  It is a battle to keep our mind focused on Jesus and enjoying Him and loving Him and following Him.  But oh the fight is worth it so worth it.   May we always ask for more of Him.  May we always ask to go deeper with Him.  May we always be willing to obey Him.

JULY BOOK..... Now this one is fiction by one of my favorite authors.

Bridge to Haven
Francine Rivers

This is Donna.  I started the new book and right away had to google common causes of death in the 1600's.  I don't know if I am recommending you do the same or not.  Maybe I am... If you like history.  Maybe I am not - the details are disturbing.  I don't know how anyone made it - living, that is - in the 1600's, infant, youth or adult.  Disease. Injury. Child bearing.  I am so thankful for modern medicine right now and less labor intensive jobs for me, my husband, my children.  - Nice to hear from you Lindsey E.  I just read your post.

Better Late than never...

I've also really enjoyed reading this book and reading everyone's posts and take aways from the book! I love to bake and cook but I tend to go for the sugary and fattening recipes! So it was fun to try out some healthy recipes that I actually liked.
Disclaimer= I am a teacher- but terrible with grammar and spelling! (I teach special education- so we kind of pick and choose and skip around with our skills ha!) So I am sorry for all my errors! I also am not the best at organizing my thoughts- so I will probably just kind of ramble on and on.

I'll start with the recipes I've made so far then share a little more after. I did actually take some pictures of my recipes:

Breakfast Quinoa

On the Breakfast Quinoa- I added a little hot sauce and it made it delicious! I also made it for dinner and not breakfast. I was at Jen's once when she made it for the kids! (Petros was so sweet and even offered me a bite or two- but it was right before a workout and I didn't think I probably should ha! ) It looked good though, so I had to try it! I have to admit when I was reading about it in the book though I was quite skeptical!! I had never eaten a apple chicken sausage before! They are quite tasty! It was also very filling too.

   

Blueberry Crisp (with some frozen yogurt/ice-cream on top)

Funny story on the blueberry crisp- it is delicious... But I made it and wasn't paying full attention to the ingredients I was adding and then after I made it and was ready to put it in the oven and my mom walked into the kitchen, I asked her what that terrible smell could be and she said, "you didn't add that garlic olive oil did you?" I bought garlic olive oil and I didn't even realize it. She realized it and wondered what I was doing but didn't question me haha! I was just thinking hmmmm this healthy stuff stinks ha! I'd never cooked with almond meal before so I thought maybe it was that! So then I had to wash the blueberries- I didn't want to waste 4 cups of blueberries! So I washed them all off one by one and got rid of the garlicky crisp and started over on the topping! It tasted great- just glad I didn't eat garlicky blueberries. 

Breakfast Cookies

I made the breakfast cookies as well! They are quite good too! I am excited to have them for my mornings that I can just grab them and run out the door on my way to teach summer school! (I added a few more chocolate chips than it called for- but that is the only difference!) 

I am excited to make some more recipes in here as well! I really want to try some of the soups in the winter and try out the enchiladas! I just got back from Mexico where I obviously also got to eat a lot of really good Mexican food- so maybe in a couple weeks I'll try out the enchiladas! 

I went to Mexico on a mission trip to work in an orphanage. It was a wonderful trip and I am very thankful I got to go! I also had lots of time in the airport to read- so I finally finished the book! I am a little slow at reading choice books in the school year- so I was glad for the free time to finish the book! 

Here are some of my favorite quotes from the book or things that really stuck out- I know all of you have read the book- but these are I feel like are specific to what I am currently learning: 

"What's becoming clearer and clearer to me is that the most sacred moments, the ones in which I feel God's presence most profoundly, when I feel the goodness of the world most arrestingly, take place at the table... It's not, actually, strictly, about the food for me. It's about what happens when we come together, slow down, open our homes, look into one another's faces, listen to one another's stories."

"we don't learn to love each other well in the easy moments. Anyone is good company at a cocktail party. But love is born when we misunderstand one another and make it right, when we cry in the kitchen, when we show up uninvited with magazines and granola bars, in an effort to say, I love you."

        -whenever my family-immediate or extended gets together we always end up sitting in the kitchen. We usually never sit on the comfy couch but always standing around in the kitchen or sitting at the kitchen table! I have so many beautiful memories there. I can proudly say my mom always made sure to give us a family dinner growing up around the table together. I think that is so important and many families are lacking that today! 

         -I also have so many fond and hard memories with friends around a table- whether it was a meal, coffee or sometimes a cupcake or cookie- so many memories of people coming along side of me and meeting me where I was and coming into my pain or joy and living life with me! 

"...the best is yet to come. She (her mom) teaches me through her words and her actions, that if you take the next right step, if you live a life of radical and honest prayer, if you allow yourself to be led by God's spirit, no matter how far from home and familiarity it takes you, you won't have to worry about what you want to be when you grow up. You'll be too busy living a life of passion and daring."

          -I am constantly learning the importance of prayer- what prayer should look like, being honest in my prayers, trusting God, truly repenting, asking for help every day- every hour --living by the spirit-- acknowledging God for who He is, and seeking a deep relationship with the Lord! 

"But what I found in Mexico is that being everywhere was keeping me from being anywhere, from being in any one very particular place. All of a sudden, that silence- that blessed, glorious strange silence- let me be complete in one place. I was totally there, totally in it, without feeling like my mind was divided into a thousand small splinters, spinning out all over the world, leaving nothing, but a glassy stare and twitchy fingers always reaching for my phone... how little I missed on pinterest and facebook. I think about how valuable it is to live this life in front of you, regardless of how tempting it is to press your face to the glass of other people's lives online, even though doing that is so much safer and so entirely addictive" 

         -It was funny to read this section while in Mexico when I also did not have any cell reception or access to the "real world" back home or internet or anything! It was sooo great to be fully engaged! That was one of our prayers as a group when we got to Mexico- to dive right in and be fully there- to see the orphans and caretakers through God's eyes and heart- to seek his will to be done and not go in and plan on our thoughts or ideas- but to seek him and be fully there with no distractions. It was crazy that I didn't crave to get on facebook, insta-gram, twitter or pinterest... even though here at home sometimes I get bored at a stoplight and check my news-feeds! 

"One of the themes of my life this season, as much as I hate to admit it is this: BETTER LATE THAN NEVER. It's how I begin most of my emails, what I put in cards on top of birthday gifts and shower gifts that I always seem to be delivering after the fact. Better late than never, unfortunately is kind of the story of this season of life, when days feel so short and the months fly by." 

             -I never thought of myself as a late person- I consider myself a person who is on time and not late- but I have been realizing that I am actually late quite often! I am not late to work or appointments or things like that but going to church, sending cards, calling people back, meeting friends or going to ball games or whatever else may come up- I tend to usually be on the late side! Even with this- I am late writing it! I have my priorities mixed up sometimes. 

"I want you to stop running from thing to thing to thing, and to sit down at the table, to offer the people you love something humble and nourishing, like soup and bread, like a story, like a hand holding another hand while you pray. We live in a world that values us for how fast we go, for how much we accomplish, for how much life we can pack into one day. But I'm coming to believe it's in the in-between spaces that our lives change, and that the real beauty lies there." 

            -Being in Mexico and taking time off to actually be present and not have distractions really made me see where my priorities are and what needs to change! I've gone on other trips before and it is always so crazy how much you really can pack into your day because you are so intentional with your time- not packing things into your day that are irrelevant- like I do at home. The days go on forever because you get up early, have small group time, have 3 set meals a day with people around a table, serving others, having praise and worship, and then also packing in communicating and getting to know each other! It is a wonderful experience to have! We had a wonderful leader who talked to us about our experiences and how we will have SO many but we just keep going from experience to experience to experience and we don't take time to stop, reflect and see what God is teaching us- we just go, go, go... She stressed that we need to put the things that we experience into action and let it change us. So she talked about this continuous cycle that we go through  experiences----> reflection ----------> change -------------> action. She talked about how we need to look at our experiences we have and reflect on them- ask what is God teaching me about myself, others and Himself through these experiences. Then we need to take the reflections of our experiences and figure out okay what needs to change- how can I get less of me and more of Him!? Then from those changes we are seeing, thinking about talking about need action. Then we just keep going and have more experiences and it starts all over again! With all that being said I really liked this quote and thought it was fitting for a few of the things I learned on my trip. I also want to be very intentional with taking the things I learned from my trip and this book and making sure I spend time reflecting and put them into action and not just think or talk about them! (that was actually what our Sermon was on this past Sunday too... haha think God is trying to tell me something?!?!) 

That's all my ramblings for now! I'm excited for our next book :) Thanks again for doing this Jen! 

Bread and Wine and Grand Island, NE

Good morning Book Club.  It's Donna.

Hannah, Jess, Kathy, Jen - loved reading your posts.  I texted Jen after reading them and said, "I love being real with real people."

I jotted down thoughts while reading the book and while reading your posts. I, like you, love the push to keep things around the table.  Let's keep fighting for it.  My kids hear the importance of family meals at the table and have told me in so many words that I have their approval of our way of life that way.  Your kids will tell you the same thing some day.  I, like you, have had some type of eating issue.  I used food as something - not sure what - I don't know how to explain it.  I gave my life to the Lord after living a rough five years without Him.  Then I just decided to quit eating.  I had no husband and no kids so it was just me.  Maybe it was bc I gave up control of my life so God could take over but giving up control made me find something to control - so food it was. Whatever you sense you might be doing with food, just know you are not alone.  Keep fighting.  I will pray.  Keep looking and imagining and dreaming and changing things...

The notes I made while reading...I have condensed alot and who knows if this even reads well.

1)  I immediately wrote down "I woulda never picked this book!"  And I used that exclamation mark bc I loved that I really never woulda picked it and really woulda missed out had I not joined "the group"...  and I used that exclamation point also bc it's so fun to be open and willing to things I maybe would have never otherwise considered.  And it was fun to kinda get that same message from the author, too.

2)  I'm a baker's daughter and I don't know how to bake.  I can cook but I like to say I am "scared" of yeast - said it for decades - which really just means that I am scared of failing a loaf of bread - which, after reading the book, I am encouraged and I can't wait to try her bread recipe!

3)  I learned from a different niece than Jen the importance of finding your way in the kitchen -something the author talked about doing.   Once I asked my niece to cut up a watermelon or something. Later that year she told me how she had never experienced being able to cut something up how ever she wanted.  She always felt like she couldn't do it the "right" way in the kitchen no matter what it was.  Her words have always stuck with me.  

4)  "Start where you are."   I like the encouragement of the statement and also the story behind it.  The author said that in the 50's, the factories no longer had a war to think about so they needed something else to make, so they started canning up soups and boxing up cake mixes and the advertisers had the job of convincing American women that cooking was "too much work; too difficult; not worth the time learning."  It produced women who didn't know where to start in the kitchen.   I wonder what propaganda I have been exposed to and bought into...

5)  "More salt. More butter. More heat."  I am REMEMBERING this!!

6) Let's not be perfect; it's so over rated.  I have the yucky gene so I liked these reminders...

    "What people are craving isn't perfection.  People are aren't longing to be impressed.  They're longing to feel like they're at home, no matter how small, undone, odd."

   "The heart of hospitality is about creating space for someone to feel seen and heard and loved.  It's about declaring your table a safe zone." Anytime there is the word "safe", count me in.

   "...perfectly wrapped gift, perfectly bake cookies, perfectly resentful and frazzled self, ready to snap at the first family member who looks at me wrong."  I know what this looks and feels like from a family member.  It's scary and I don't like it and I know I never want to be it.

7)  "It's my job to walk him (her) quite literally, from baby to toddler to boy (girl) to man (woman)."  That makes me cry.  I have a 20 year old young man so in that sense, I have watched this statement come to fruition and I hope to see it happen two more times.  I hope you get to see it in each of your children, too.  I remember staying at home with him.  I remember staying home with two boys. Then three boys. I remember planning 3 meals and snacks a day, in and day out for 13 years as a stay at home mom.  It's hard.  I hear your posts and pain in the tedious work of feeding your family.  I know.  Sometimes it's not pretty - the meal - the attitude.  I know bc I have been there.  I got tired of meals, too.  You will find some things along the way that will work - some tricks, some reliable meals, and some reasons to keep trying - some reasons to like (or kinda like) this hard job.

Jen Stutzman, great pick of a book.  I'm looking forward to the next one.